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Topic: Paralyzed with fear

WonderfulClient started this discussion 6.2 years ago #2,773

How do you do something - a job, an essay, an exam - when you are paralyzed with fear?

How do you push through that fear, not knowing whether you'll do well, and just do it any way? And do well?

Jasper joined in and replied with this 6.1 years ago, 28 minutes later[^] [v] #0

You just do it, there is nothing to it but to it.... Ive done this plenty of times in the past month and this is the only way of going about it.... "Everything you want is on the other side of fear"-unknown

meh joined in and replied with this 6.1 years ago, 29 minutes later, 58 minutes after the original post[^] [v] #0

i dunno if this will work for you but this is how it works for me.

I think very very small. Not about tomorrow or results or what if. Find the smallest task that you can think of and only focus on doing that until it's done. Make sure to give yourself credit once you've finished one. Don't think it's just some meaningless shit because it's small (it's part of a bigger whole).

I remind myself that however bad I might do by dwelling on this fear I can only make it worse. And anyway..the point is to do your best within the limitations of the moment. You can't do more than that anyway.Therefore I am doing all that is humanly possible. So just relax. As much as you can do will be enough.

Also..when i get like that I often reach the conclusion that it's about what other people expect of me(how i think i will be perceived if i fail and how i will judge myself in relation to others etc.)If i look a bit deeper, all I want for myself is a peaceful life and I don't need a Nobel prize for that. Even if i do fail it won't be the end of the world. Nobody ever got anywhere without failing. So screw what everyone else thinks and even what you think of yourself in comparison to everyone else. The simple thing is that you are doing this because this is what you have chosen to do at the moment. job-exam etc just means that you later get to tell people about what you've been doing and that's all. Don't make it more important than it is.

all the best

WonderfulClient (OP) replied with this 6.1 years ago, 9 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #0

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Thank you

(Edited 28 seconds later.)

Molly joined in and replied with this 6.1 years ago, 2 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[^] [v] #0

I love that, "Everything you want is on the other side of fear"-unknown Very appropriate.


What I do is when I am full of fear,I try and remember that fear,and excitement are the same physiological state in the human body. So when you are excited,or scared,telling yourself to calm down doesn't work well.You can't demand the body like that. BUT you can trick your mind. The only thing that separates excitement from fear is an illusory "safety" seat belt. One you feel safe. The other you do not.

I get scared in certain situations,and I tell myself the opposite of what I naturally tend to do. Especially heights. I tell myself I'm safe,and pretend I am excited,all while letting the adrenaline rush.


(Edited 42 seconds later.)

Shh joined in and replied with this 6.1 years ago, 2 hours later, 4 hours after the original post[^] [v] #0

I do the "what's the worst thing that could happen?" and if it really is something terrible, then I ask "what is the likelihood of that happening?"

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